How’s Your Sleep? (Part 1)

Understanding the Nervous System + Sleep Connection

If your sleep has been unpredictable lately—hard to fall asleep, waking up at 3 a.m., or dragging through the day—you’re not alone.

Whether you’re navigating a transition, shouldering (invisible) labor at home or work, or just absorbing the weight of the world, your sleep may be telling you something important: your nervous system is overloaded.

As a Somatic Experiencing® Practitioner in Palm Springs, I often work with high-performing, mission-driven women who can do it all—until their body says otherwise. And sleep is usually one of the first signs that something in the system needs tending.

Why Sleep Isn’t Just About “Shutting Down”

We often think of sleep as a binary: on or off, asleep or awake. But sleep is a delicate biological rhythm governed by your autonomic nervous system—the same system that manages stress, digestion, and heart rate.

When you’re under chronic stress, your body can get stuck in sympathetic activation (fight/flight) or a dorsal state (shutdown/freeze). In either state, your system doesn’t feel safe enough to deeply rest.

You might notice:

• Racing thoughts as soon as your head hits the pillow

• Waking up between 2–4 a.m. with a pounding heart or anxious mind

• Feeling “tired but wired” all day

• Difficulty falling back asleep after waking

Sleep Requires Safety—Even if You're Not Consciously Stressed

Here’s the thing: even if you’re doing “all the right things” with sleep hygiene—no screens, lavender tea, sound machines, sleep mask and blackout cirtains—if your nervous system is dysregulated, your body won’t let you fully rest.

You might be holding tension from:

• Past trauma or unfinished stress responses

• Cultural pressure to overperform or prove your worth

• Grief, transition, or loss that hasn’t been metabolized

• Long-standing patterns of high achievement and self-sacrifice

Sound familiar?

Somatic Experiencing®: A Gentle Way Back to Rest

Somatic Experiencing (SE) is a body-based approach to healing stress and trauma. Rather than pushing your body to “calm down,” it listens for where your nervous system is stuck and offers gentle, titrated support to restore resilience and safety.

In our work together, we don’t just talk about what’s keeping you up at night—we work with the sensations, rhythms, and impulses of your body so that rest can become available again, naturally.

Clients often say things like:

“For the first time in years, I can fall asleep without a podcast blaring in the background.”

“I wake up less and feel more rested—even on short nights.”

“I didn’t realize how much I was bracing all day until I started feeling safe enough to let go at night.”

A New Relationship to Sleep Starts with Awareness

Before changing habits, supplements, or even your bedtime, try asking:

What’s my nervous system holding right now that hasn’t had space to settle?

Sometimes, that question alone opens the door to a different kind of relationship with sleep—one that’s less about fixing and more about listening.

Next up in this series…

In Part 2, we’ll explore how life transitions—especially perimenopause—affect sleep, and how Somatic Experiencing can support you through these hormonal and identity shifts. Stay tuned.

Want to work together?
If your sleep has been a struggle and you suspect stress is part of the picture, I’d love to support you through private somatic coaching—online or in Palm Springs. Contact me here to learn more.

The Wisdom of Wings: What the Myth of Icarus Can Teach Us About Resilience Today

Imagine this: a father and son stand on the edge of a labyrinthine tower, wings made of wax and feathers strapped to their backs. Below them, the deep blue sea stretches endlessly; above, the blazing sun waits. Daedalus, the master craftsman, warns his son, Icarus:

“Fly not too high, lest the sun melt your wings. Nor too low, lest the sea weigh them down.”

And so begins one of the most iconic myths of ancient Greece—a tale of freedom, flight, ambition, and consequence.

But what if this story isn’t just a warning about overreaching?

What if it’s also a metaphor for how we navigate our own emotional and energetic range?

The Window of Resilience: Our Modern-Day Wings

In trauma-informed healing work, we often talk about the Window of Resilience—the optimal zone in which we can feel, think, and respond with flexibility and presence.

When we are within this window, we are connected. We can access our intuition, creativity, and power. When we move outside of it, we swing into either:

• Hyperarousal (too much activation, like anxiety, overwhelm, rage),
  or

• Hypoarousal (too little activation, like numbness, shutdown, or depression).

This isn’t just nervous system theory—it’s life in motion.

And doesn’t that sound familiar?

Flying too high—too close to the sun—might look like burnout, overdoing, or constantly proving your worth. Flying too low—too close to the sea—might look like playing small, staying silent, or shrinking yourself to be “safe.”

Ancient Myths as Mirrors for Modern Lives

Here’s the thing: Greek myths weren’t just entertainment. They were encoded messages about how to live wisely, bravely, and in balance with the forces of nature—both outside and within.

The myth of Icarus reminds us of something vital: True power lies in finding the middle path—the space where we can stretch, risk, feel, and still remain tethered to our own inner knowing.

In our world, though, women aren’t usually punished for flying too high.

We are conditioned, subtly and not-so-subtly, to stay close to the sea.

• To quiet our brilliance.

• To swallow our rage.

• To smooth over conflict.

• To put others’ needs before our own wisdom.

So if we’re going to learn from this myth, we may need to flip it a little.

For Many Women, the Greater Risk is in Rising

In my work as a coach and Somatic Experiencing Practitioner, I see it every day: the fear of rising.

Not the fear of failure, but the fear of what will happen if we stop dimming our light.

Flying “too high” might mean:

• Saying what you really think in a meeting.

• Raising your prices.

• Leaving a relationship that no longer honors your becoming.

• Saying yes to a dream that no one else can see but you.

And it might feel scary. But this is what reclaiming your wings looks like.

Resilience isn’t about staying small. It’s about expanding the range of what you can tolerate without abandoning yourself.

What You Can Do Right Now

As you go about your day, try asking yourself:

• Where am I right now? Within my window of resilience, or outside it?

• Am I shrinking when I could be rising?

• What would it mean to fly in my own centerline—balanced, powerful, present?

And if you want support in doing that, or if the land of Greece is calling you home in some deep, ancient way—I’d love to walk with you there.

Returning to the Land of Myth: A Retreat for the Soul

This September, I’m offering a 7-night retreat in the Peloponnese, Greece, called Myth & Meaning.

We’ll gather under the olive trees, surrounded by mountains and sea, to reconnect with the archetypal stories that still live in us.

Through embodiment practices, Somatic Experiencing, mythology, and circle work, we’ll explore:

• What myths are you still living?

• Where are you flying too low or too high?

• How do you come back into your own window of resilience?

• And what happens when you allow yourself to reclaim your wings?

This isn’t just a vacation. It’s an epic journey to something ancient, wise, and utterly alive in you.

Isn’t it time you answered the call?

The Myth and Meaning Retreat in Greece (august 31 - September 7) is now open for registration for a limited time. CLICK HERE FOR ALL THE DETAILS AND Join us.